My Asthenia

Alas, the jolly feeling is back again. As we celebrate the joyous Christmas, the birth of the Savior. Its a real interesting experience this year, actually writing little notes and preparing gifts for the cell. Through this, I’ve realized how much i really know about any of them. Sure, their hobbies and stuff they do, i got that but what the live for, what their belief is, i haven’t got the chance to find out. Rather i haven’t been bothered enough to find out. I have resolved to search and have better relationships next year. Its gonna end in a cul de sac way, just like it always does if i don’t. I really don’t want that surge of piousness to fade in nonexistence even as the camp fever slowly fades away. I want to have a tete-a-tete with Him all over again. If only circumstance would fade away. As the year draws to an end, i have many resolutions. I want to accomplish these resolutions. A New year, a New beginning. I’m in love with The Shadow Of The Wind. A great read.

Belief

Sometimes i wonder. You hope for something. You pray for something. You know you really need it, but would it turn out the way you desire? Just believing. Working at it. Sometimes you fail. Other times you stumble.

Our hope in our future is a result of our belief. What we aspire drives us, emotionally and physically. You’ll reach a point in time where things aren’t that awesome. You doubt. You waver. You lose your belief. You really are trying not to but it happens.

Stand firm. Your beliefs drive you. Your thoughts affect you. Your hope drives you. I once aspire to own the world. I believe in self-contentment.  Sucess isn’t a destination, its the journey. Press on in this race of life. At the end you’ll turn to the sky and see the zenith. That is when you’ll be at your peak. I earnestly hope.

I’ll press on.

the holidays have been slow and boring and yea the usual stuff happens. Went to thailand on the second week. it was an interesting trip, learned stuff, saw stuff, observed stuff. this week, i’ve been doing nothing much. i’m guilty of not attending any council outings/events/gatherings. stuff just happens. right. i’ve been trying to like pull up my grades by doing work but i guess its either working very slowly or not working at all. shucks CAP…wanted to try but i didn’t..guess i’ll have to wait..shucks. Heard the 30hr famine was rather cool..hoped so. shucks too bad i couldn’t go..tough luck.Kudos to all those who survived it. im stuck on this really cool read. the author’s not well-known but its usually the undiscovered talents that make the cut best. school’s starting mighty soon, i’m not sure what to expect. i’d love to stay at home doing nothing lying around with a good book but life has to go on. i’ll leave that for the december holidays.

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AH yes. RMUN. the raffles model united nations. i must say it was an interesting experience.i must say i now see certain people in a different light. I wasn’t present on the last day since i left for malaysia. The malaysia trip was great, it always is when you are going with your best buddies and stuff. we missed quite a bit of stuff. the forest trek was shortened due to the unforeseen rain.the rice mill machinery broke down so thats that. the hotel was pretty ok apart from the cockroaches and the non-stop toilet flushing. we spent most of our days on the bus. We BRIDGED, taiteed. had fun.

haha..well my blog’s dead as usual..well..im really unsure about OM..cos..i’ve just realised that we may just be screwed..went to heng xuan’s house to do part of the filming for Geo-Ad. Walked the SUPER long walk in and ended up at his house:D filmed a bit..watched The Incredibles. Went to Taka for dinner at Ajisen..then we went to film while the others had COFFEE..good expensive cold coffee..wanted to catch a late night movie but realised that we had to be in sch by 12am so w couldnt cos it was already 10 when we got to newton. the Geography Quiz guys and i stayed back in school yesterday for Geo-Ad..was interesting. spent a mega long time at the com lab playing lameass flash games and watched as Kenneth tried to transfer the video to the lappy. he took approximately 3.5 hours to do it and we edited it. BLAH BLAH…FAST FORWARD..OK Heng Xuan wanted to scare joel foo and kenneth as they went to the toilet..he wore a WHITE mask and with his hoodie, i’d be scared shitless save for him identifying himself. he stomped his way outside the toilet and joel and kenneth were prepared..his plan failed totally. Fun O Rama was fun even tho’ my ‘gang’ and i didnt do much save for walking around aimlessly..the initial idea was to spend the money but we didnt play any games so the last resort was to head for the souvenirs..haha i bought a Fun O Rama shirt..then soon after i went on the voyage home aboard the RSS 74..the super long and depressing bus ride home..thats basically what happened the last 2 days except for some boring parts..:D

hmm.. think i’m getting used to this life..life of a busy student.with no other purpose except to study, get as much cca points as possible and just survive these 2 years. seriously i mean it.im starting to appreciate free time. blissful free time which unfortunately i never have. maybe those little minutes and seconds can collate to a large some. i’d really never know. i’ve been believing in God that is. have learnt to trust him no matter what..he’ll get me through. i know what im typing here is probably familiar to anyone of you. but i honestly am learning how to lean on Him. the tower of strength. sometimes the most unexpected things happen to you when you least expect it. guess that’s God’s plan. When you work as a photographer you find out real quick peoples’ faces lie. most people are deceiving. you’ll never know..

happy chinese new year!!! beach outing with the guys were awesome.. like real cool..and fun.haha seth, justin, xuan,ted,keith,bryan,tiang,shaun,dominic..guys you rock man.. haha all those great times together..haha..welll something had been bugging me but i shan’t reveal it..damn why are things so controversial..conflicts have been sprouting..just screw it..whatever peace left is left to shred and burn like pieces of cloth..

Sick and tired of all this shit… schools getting real uninteresting.. its just homework..mugging for test..homework..mugging for tests and exams. its really brings about a new definition to life as a student. most of us are chained to our books. slaves to notes. this is so darn annoying the only thing worth looking forward to is that the hols are coming right up. just right up. a break..finally a little moment to savor what little of our youth left behind the cell of education..nah that’s just bull.. i wanna get a new RACKET!!! Prince perhaps…the only problem is the $$$$..CNY savings..oh well..thats all for today

hello…oh well school’s kinda getting routine right about now..6 tests next week..grades are alright..FOR NOW!!. except Physics that i failed an open book assignment.. i suck BIG time..life carries on..i gotta mug..like crazy if not i’m doomed.. like dead doomed. my little aspiration to be more sociable..is failing at least for now and the rest of this year..schs just busy but im gettin the hang of it..dang..face vs facades what’s the difference they are both fake or at least perceived to be. there will never be a just judgment..unless that is you are blind. oh well..damn all those materialistic people..